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USA! |
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Posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:22:18 2014 USA! USA! USA! |
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VTB! |
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Posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 02:24:06 2014, in response to USA!, posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:22:18 2014. VTB! VTB! VTB! |
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Re: USA! |
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Posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:25:45 2014, in response to USA!, posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:22:18 2014. EE. UU! EE. UU! EE. UU! |
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Re: VTB! |
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Posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:26:15 2014, in response to VTB!, posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 02:24:06 2014. WUC? |
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CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 02:30:34 2014, in response to Re: VTB!, posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:26:15 2014. CSA! CSA! CSA!...COME ON, how hard is it to send a customer service associate this way? I've got thirty people lined up trying to buy tickets here! |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:37:56 2014, in response to CSA!, posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 02:30:34 2014. Fuck the Confederacy and fuck their so-called "flag." |
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Re: USA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 02:46:49 2014, in response to USA!, posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:22:18 2014. SBU! SBU! |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 02:58:32 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Spider-Pig on Wed May 7 02:37:56 2014. What Confederacy? I'm just trying to get one of my customer service associates to come back from his 90-minute "break" and actually serve some customers!If they don't invent a time machine and open their registers an hour ago, they're fired. In the last five minutes, there have been over a dozen angry complaints, a small act of vandalism against posted signage, and at least four people sending angry letters to my CEO and/or their MP. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 03:02:51 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 02:58:32 2014. Good luck with that errant associate, how about a living wage, you fascist pig? Then maybe there might be fucks given. ;) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 03:08:54 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 03:02:51 2014. They make 4/50 per hour, that's enough to live on. In my country, you don't complain about low wages— the employees who give 110% keep their jobs and the employees who whine about that being mathematically impossible end up looking for the unemployment office. And they never find it because there is no unemployment office. So they either learn to make do without mathematical laws or they turn into hobos that nobody ever loves.It's not fascist, it's just good business. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 03:26:37 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 03:08:54 2014. We're almost there ourselves. :( |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 06:02:25 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 03:26:37 2014. Yeah, except the average American cashier doesn't make 4/50 per hour. Official exchange rates don't really exist, but according to estimates based on purchasing power, 4/50 ≈ $11.25 or so. Given that 55-hour work weeks are commonplace for everyone from cashier to CEO, that's an annual salary of ~$32,175, all of which is take-home pay because my country doesn't have any taxes.(Sorry for continuing the whole Nilet Railroad stuff, kind of got on a roll here.) Or perhaps I should say a "role." Heh. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 06:09:30 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 06:02:25 2014. No problem, we run on antigravity up here which seriously affects the exchange rates by separating coin from pockets without benefit of human intervention. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 06:24:55 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 06:09:30 2014. Hey, in my country everyone starts earning 4/50 per hour if they're lucky but social mobility is extremely high. Sure, the 1% remains fixed at 1% of the population, but your future ability to join that exclusive club is not influenced by your ancestry in any way. Unlike America, my country is a true democracy. Well, it's a republic. More or less. OK, it's an oligarchy, but it's a meritocratic oligarchy where every child has exactly the same chance of eventually joining the ranks of the powerful as every other, save for the influences of their own hard work. Well, and innate talent. And luck is always involved even without a birth lottery handing out privilege to one baby and poverty to another at random. But it's still more meritocratic than America. As long as you belong to the correct gender. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 17:57:37 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Wed May 7 06:24:55 2014. Me want snu-snu! :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 09:26:34 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 7 17:57:37 2014. Snu-snu? Having trouble with the translation there. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 19:58:22 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 09:26:34 2014. Maybe THIS will help. ;) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 21:52:43 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 19:58:22 2014. Ah. Well not too many people come to my country for that. The human population is a tiny minority and when you do find someone you'll find the atmosphere to be less than conducive to any physical activity— 35° Celsius and humid. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 22:03:36 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 21:52:43 2014. Yeah, that'd kinda spoil the snu snu. Not interested then. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 22:17:55 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 22:03:36 2014. That's OK. Most people come for the economic opportunities and/or the complete lack of any prejudice or bigotry that might impact humans. Sure, the place is a sauna but there's no racism or rape culture either.Since you've already decided not to pay a visit, I guess it won't dissuade you further to mention that my country has no beer. (Unless you go to specialty shops, and even then it's expensive and nasty.) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 22:30:57 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 22:17:55 2014. No ... BEER?!?!?! :OWell then ... no WONDER you don't have any problems. Nobody wants to live there. Heh. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 22:53:46 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 22:30:57 2014. The lack of beer hasn't been much of a problem. After all, humans are a very small minority. More than 90% of the population can't drink beer; ethanol is extremely poisonous to them.However, they get drunk on ethylene glycol, so even the diviest of dive bars will have several brands of antifreeze on tap. Meanwhile, their bodies are unable to absorb tetrahydrocannabinol, so it never occurred to them to ban it. Lousy beer. Decent pot. It appeals to some. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 23:02:33 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 8 22:53:46 2014. Being an ontapanoor type, I'm still browsing your brochure. Given that the most expensive part of brewing is the hops, substitution with cannibis might be a possibility. If I were to set up a brewery though, I would require at least some caves that maintain 15-20C for the ferment. I could help bring new meaning to the term, "beer bong." ;) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Fri May 9 17:57:08 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 8 23:02:33 2014. Hm, the environment is fixed at 35C and installing the cooling system for your brewery will be expensive. Luckily, the power for it is cheap. The space won't be, though— my country is rather cramped for that. Its unique physical circumstances mean you can actually build more real estate if you need it but that's even more expensive. If you need it dehumidified, that would add yet another expense.If you can get started, though, there is a considerable market for decent beer and/or pot. Just remember that drinking and smoking in public is You may be able to cover some of your startup costs by bringing a few pallets of chocolate down with you. The bulk of my country's population can't tolerate caffeine very well and it is the opinion of the human minority that the "non-caffeinated" chocolate on offer just isn't as good. That or coffee. You can find coffee in my country but you need to look for the label that says "human coffee" or has the standard national "no aliens" symbol on it— otherwise it's not going to be real coffee. Either way, if you prefer it sweet, make sure the glucose syrup doesn't say "synthetic" because if it does, it's probably racemic. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Fri May 9 18:13:37 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Fri May 9 17:57:08 2014. Well ... given that you need just shy of a kilo of barley to toss a wort for each gallon of output, this sounds like this is going to get expensive real fast. Especially if we have to import the grains. And given those temps, they'd wilt real fast. :)I think we'll build a port and just send in tankers. Deposit tankers, of course. Heh. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Fri May 9 20:39:10 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Fri May 9 18:13:37 2014. No need to import the grains. Hops maybe, but you can find plenty of grains. Unless you want all-American grains in which case you'd have to import those.Note that my country has no roads, ports, or other heavy shipping channels, so you'll have to ship the beer by teleportation. Expect to lose ~10% of your product, as fully accurate teleportation is prohibitively expensive for regular shipments. Proper packing techniques might lower that to ~7% and investing in a set of area scanners could get it as low as 2% if you're lucky. Note that area scanners cost 2,400/ to 3,000/ per cubic meter scanned, but it pays off in the long run. I'm afraid that my own rail freight operations were discontinued when long-range teleportation approached its current price point. Now I only carry passengers, since even a 2% loss is a deal-breaker when it comes to your body and fully accurate teleportation is still prohibitively expensive for frequent use by most people (and as a railroad, I'm doing everything to keep it that way). Actually, if you're really good with information and processing and transmissions, you might be able to figure out a way to limit the 2% teleport loss to the beer guts people might develop from your product and then get super-rich. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Fri May 9 23:15:18 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Fri May 9 20:39:10 2014. Well ... to make this all worthwhile, I'm going to have to do something about that competition. And since Kew Gardens Teleport is probably your teleportation director, we're gonna have to corner HIM first. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Sat May 10 19:56:21 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Fri May 9 23:15:18 2014. I don't have a teleportation director, I'm in the railroad business. I have an anti-teleportaton director tasked with making sure accurate teleportation never becomes cheap enough to compete, but I'm not supposed to tell anyone about that. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Sat May 10 23:44:40 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Sat May 10 19:56:21 2014. Now THAT'S the kind of big government Olog can finally support! :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 14:33:30 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Sat May 10 23:44:40 2014. My country has a small government and absolutely no taxes.I'm a private company doing it for my own profit! |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 14:49:09 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 14:33:30 2014. Like I said, that's his speed. Even saves him the trouble of trying to drown it in the bathtub. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by LuchAAA on Sun May 11 15:06:33 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 14:33:30 2014. How big is your army? |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 17:26:33 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by LuchAAA on Sun May 11 15:06:33 2014. Fairly large in terms of raw numbers, but very small when adjusted for population.Of course, the size of an army isn't nearly as important as its technology. My country has teleportation, so most defenses can be bypassed and most enemy soldiers avoided. Accordingly, its tactics are mostly limited to strategic destruction or sabotage of key enemy equipment, often without a single shot fired or enemy soldier alerted (although sometimes alerting enemy soldiers is part of the mission). That's why it's a stretch to say my country is "at war" even though the Senate claims exactly that. If caught on enemy territory, my country's soldiers generally avoid returning fire if at all possible. Their shells are tough enough to withstand small arms fire and heavier weapons can't be brought to bear in the relatively short time it takes to teleport home. Meanwhile, my own country's physical defenses are impregnable without teleportation, so the risk of invasion is nil. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 17:44:05 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 14:49:09 2014. Frankly, I don't think Olog would like my country very much. Sure, the government is small and there aren't any taxes, but the government does handle law enforcement and does so without regard for wealth and status. If I stopped maintaining my infrastructure and a train derailed on the broken worn-out track resulting in several fatalities, my CEO could go to prison for several counts of negligent homicide— showing he'd allocated money to the MOW budget with the expectation the rails would be kept in repair would keep him out of prison, but showing he'd allocated money to an expensive lawyer wouldn't.My employees having to take responsibility for the stuff they do in my name is more influential than the regulations that I'd face in America. Something tells me Olog wouldn't be too happy about it though. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 20:05:45 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 17:44:05 2014. Well ... sounded simple enough to satisfy Olog at first - big on trains, check. Limited government, check. Actually hold corporations responsible for public harm, well ... that'd be a dealbreaker. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 20:11:42 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 20:05:45 2014. Well my country is big on personal liberty and private property and absolute respect for both whether you're a person, a government, or a corporation. Not so much on personal space, though— it's crowded. All the more reason why private property is defended so vehemently. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 20:23:54 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 20:11:42 2014. Now you've got the ontapanoor in me ringing again ... tropical heat, tropical moisture, all those people in such close proximity, now I'm thinking a business dispensing cans of good smells might be in order. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 20:47:05 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 20:23:54 2014. Ah, you'd think but given how small the human population is, there isn't a lot of contact between humans amongst the crowd. The aliens don't produce any odours that are offensive to humans or to each other— the heat and humidity is their optimal environment, so it doesn't produce such an extreme reaction in them.Although good smell cans would definitely have a market— humans are more inclined to live with other humans, so they'd need what you're selling. Try raising a family in a cramped apartment, yeesh! Air fresheners that double as air purifiers work too, since humans are much more sensitive to particulates and air pollution. Though the preference for humidity suggests the aliens evolved in a place where rain is very common, so maybe rain shower heads would be a smash hit amongst the alien market. You'd think someone would already be producing them if there was money to be made, but you never know— for all their advanced technology, the aliens seem to have a lot of trouble coming up with simple ideas. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 20:50:50 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 20:47:05 2014. Yeah, was concerned that you had a lot of grays there, they can raise the dead with a single whiff. But yeah, let me hit up my lab guys and let's see what we can design. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by LuchAAA on Sun May 11 21:31:37 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Sun May 11 17:26:33 2014. Good post. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Wed May 14 02:45:14 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Sun May 11 20:50:50 2014. Nah, there really aren't any grays. Individual colouration varies of course, but the usual pattern is black shell and brown extremities except for lower arms which are sometimes gray (or black).That's only for a normal alien though. An overmark is a giant mass of tentacles and horror that will leave you renouncing the gods that have clearly cursed the universe by allowing such a thing to exist. And yet, he is surrounded by cute little baby aliens who don't even look like bugs yet. An overmark smells like a thousand dead goats wearing dirty sweatsocks who have been left in a sulfur mine on a really hot day, but only humans seem to notice and they would avoid overmarks anyway. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 14 12:30:33 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Wed May 14 02:45:14 2014. Cans of good smells it is! :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 00:39:01 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Wed May 14 12:30:33 2014. Any particular ones in mind?Maybe you should sell cans of PATH smell. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 15 00:41:56 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 00:39:01 2014. I was thinking of test marketing a Patchouli-like scent first, given that it has a secondary desirability. The scent reminds republicans of Nancy Pelosi which will assist in convincing them to leave. :) |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 01:17:36 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 15 00:41:56 2014. There aren't any Republicans in my country— they're notoriously xenophobic!Admittedly, we do have a "Republican Party," but that's a completely separate thing. In my country, the Republican Party leans liberal, the Liberal Party is conservative, and the Conservative Party is libertarian with anarchist leanings. At the moment, we have a coalition government between the Liberal Party and the pro-war Statesman Party, holding a total of 121 seats. The Republican Party and the more left-wing National Party have 167 seats between them, but the center-left Republicans snubbed the farther-left Nationals by attempting to form a coalition with the anti-human New Democratic Party— when the NDP lost almost all of their seats to the Nationals in 2010, the Nationals weren't willing to forgive and forget even if it meant letting the right wing control the Offices. We'll see what happens next year— polls show a groundswell of support for the National Party in the South Midlands (which is not surprising) but the candidates along the western fringe are facing significant challenges as voters hate them for their petty refusal to deal with the Republicans. I suspect that the Nationals and Republicans will form a coalition suitably far out from the 2015 elections, allowing the Nationals to retain their western seats while gaining in the South Midlands. If that puts them over 150, they'll dissolve the coalition since they'd have a majority on their own. Meanwhile, the Senate is controlled by the Statesmen with a considerable showing from the New Democrats, as has been the case since the 1970s, since only the pro-war hawks and anti-human bigots bother voting in Senatorial elections. The only time their control over the Senate was challenged was during the Airasin administration. That was a rather interesting time to say the least. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 15 01:34:27 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 01:17:36 2014. Wow. Sounds pretty serious. May I extend my best wishes to your nation.That being the case, since our lab has managed to create over two million cans of patchouli which have turned out to be defective (a short time after the cans have been filled, the wowie zowie lasing gas which is used as a propellant causes minor explosions if subjected to vibration) it is our intent to hire up some helicopters and drop them on several red states in our own country. The exploding cans containing patchouli should result in some realignments politically in the areas of our nation which will indeed be favourable to yours by driving the republicans currently in residence in those locations south of the border into Mexico as well as across the Pacific to India where smells more appropriate to their sensitive nostrils will once again make them feel at home. I had no idea, and I have now sacked our lab folks because it appears as though they might have been experimenting with Swiss ergot spores instead our our approved chemicals in the laboratory. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Edwards! on Thu May 15 01:59:28 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 01:17:36 2014. "Hero's fight the good fight for a reason.. not for slaps on the back.. or praise from the people we protect.. We fight simply for the rights of EVERYONE to taste security,safety and freedom..with a dash of Liberty thrown in..making sure folks like You can sleep at night without worry.. If That's good enough for Us...shouldn't that be good enough for You?" Sentinel. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 02:08:52 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 15 01:34:27 2014. Anything that happens politically in my country these days is completely tame and boring. Somehow, we managed to elect a kangaroo as Prime Minister in the 1970s and then pass long-overdue tort standards because of this. It also made us the first country to elect an animal as head of state and the first country to eat a former head of state.By the way, your defective cans of patchouli may have been caused by my country's agents. We'd been happy with the GOP for a few decades since they rendered your country all but nonfunctional but they've been cutting NASA's budget so they're now more trouble than they're worth. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by LuchAAA on Thu May 15 02:12:07 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 02:08:52 2014. I vote Republican.And I'll do it again in November. You should do the same. |
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Re: CSA! |
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Posted by SelkirkTMO on Thu May 15 02:19:22 2014, in response to Re: CSA!, posted by Nilet on Thu May 15 02:08:52 2014. If that's the case, then this means war!We're not Quebec! We can't have exploding cans (regardless of size) blowing up here because some agents slipped our lab boys Swiss ergot spores. Take THIS, you furriner! |
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